“Maggie Grace, General Mills, and do Chocolate Fruit Roll-Ups make sense for your diet.”

As I watch my wife hang out with my daughter it’s natural to have quite a bucket full of emotion and thought.  During their hang-out time I walked over to the couch and took this picture.  It looks like Maggie Grace wanted a fist bump.  I obliged.

She is close to a month old.  We didn’t hear too many positive bits of advice, sadly, before she was born.  I would say 95% of the advice we received was in the category of, “Your life will never be the same.  You have no idea what you’re in for.”  Fair enough.  But it would have been nice to hear something positive.  My wife and I took mental notes to be positive advice givers.

I want to take this moment to say I never finished this post.  I will tonight.  I am continuing this about six months later.

I wonder about the world in which we have brought Maggie Grace.   Below is a pretty recent picture.  She has already changed so much.  But this post isn’t about the melancholy of the days zooming by.


Aaaaaaaaaaand I still haven’t finished this post.  Maybe it’s a sign?  

Stop typing!!! Stop typing!!! It’s a trap!!!  

Let’s finish this post with random thoughts and anecdotes.  That’ll show ’em….and it will also get this post out of my queue.

I just finished a bowl of generic Fruit Loops for dinner.  No Toucan Sam for this guy.  It’s some wacko looking dragon thing on the box.  Weird man.  I think something is in those loops.

We need new furniture.  Our couch and chair are peeling.  Maggie Grace probably thinks their chocolate Fruit Roll-Ups or something the way they release themselves from the cushions.  As if she knows what Fruit Roll-Ups are.  But still.

That reminds me of seminary.  Rented a house with some guys and if I remember correctly we didn’t have a couch but we did have four recliners in the living room.  Maybe three.  I remember watching the debut single from Audioslave on the television while sitting in recliner #2, Brutus, and thinking the band was going to be great.  The singer from Soundgarden and the band from Rage Against the Machine.  Can’t miss!  I played the song for Nikki and after the blistering opening rips your ears off she said, “This sounds unbelievable.  What a riff!”  Or something like that.  Audioslave didn’t work out like I’d hoped.

Miss that place.  I really miss seeing cockroaches scattering when I would stagger into the bathroom in the middle of the night.  (By the way, after a couple of weeks the jumping stops.)  I miss sitting in a chair with wheels at the entrance of the kitchen and being able to roll to the refrigerator without any force on my part because the house was literally splitting in two and that particular half of the house was the slanted half.  (That, my friends, is a run-on sentence.)  I sincerely miss those days.

I’ve never slept so well as I have since we’ve had a baby.  Weirdness but it’s so true.  For me, great sleep is longer naps through the night.  I’m not much of a sleeper.  I always wake up with a song in my head.  So frustrating.  But still.  I sleep great now.  All the Negative Nancy’s and Negative Norbert’s were wrong.  She hasn’t interrupted our sleep.  The kid sleeps 12 hours and when she wakes up she just lays there until we go get her from her bed thing.  Yeah.  I know.

Oh.  You were wondering about Negative Norbert?  No.  It’s not a thing.  I’m not a sexist.  Negative Nancy?  Yeah.  I’ve heard it.  We need a male version.  Want to keep the peace.  So I went with Norbert.  Great name.

That sounds really close to Go-Gurt.  Norbert.  Go-Gurt.   Okay.  Not real close.  But Go-Gurt?  Is that the best the Yoplait and General Mills marriage could come up with?

Let’s do an experiment.  I’ll start typing again in ten seconds……..


I bet myself I could come up with a better name in ten seconds.  I came up with Awesome-Gurt.  I win General Mills.  I won my bet with myself.  What did I win from myself?  A Fruit Roll-Up.

Uh-oh.  Fruit Roll-Ups.  Which are also owned by General Mills.  This is getting weird.  It’s those generic Fruit Loops man.  They get in your head.  All of those delicious fake fruit flavors turn your brain all wiggly.  Wait………………………hold on………I need to do something……….no.  The real Fruit Loops are not owned by General Mills.

Maggie Grace really likes it when I play guitar.  Or is she laughing at me?  Nah.  She wouldn’t do that.  She’s too busy peeling crap off our couch.

Here’s another picture.  Sleep my little lady.   Dream of your Savior and beautiful music.

Photo on 2013-02-22 at 16.50 #2


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