Resolutions and the Damage Done (to pants)

Thank you, Mr. Young.

As I get ready to move on not only to stretchy pants during this time of year, but to a bigger size of stretchy pant, I would like to offer my New Year’s Resolutions, which will include the goal of downsizing said stretchy pant to a more manageable size.  (I will also probably include a resolution pertaining to run-on sentences.)

Let’s go with 9.

1) I commit to reducing my off-key singing by 40%.  This is a doozy.  If followed I will be relegated to singing off-key 12 less times per afternoon.  Singing on-key is simply less fulfilling. Pray for me.

2) I commit to continue my search for new music.  Sounds like a boring resolution, but when I find a new band it helps extinguish even the worst days.

3) I just can’t.

4) I need to be better about calling friends and being an encouragement.  As we age, life can become more difficult…..and better.  We need to be a part of the process.

5)  Twinkie intake – reduced.

6) I would like to seek God at times other than when I’m in the stuff.

7) I commit to feathering my hair and going out in public.  It just seems like the right time.

8) More fiber.

9) I would like to impact eternity this year.  Take some real risk.  What happens if I fail to take risks?  Nothing.  I give you permission to hold me accountable and ask me on occasion if I have fulfilled, or attempted to fulfill,  resolution #9.

Bonus Resolution!!!

10) I would like to annoy the wife 22% less this year.  Now, if I fulfill #1 with moderate success then I will have fulfilled approximately 14.5% of #10 so it is imperative that I work on #1.  #8 would be a good place to start.  Full circle.

If 2012 truly is the year the world ends then I couldn’t be happier.  Life is good here on earth, but heaven is going to be better.

Good luck with 2012.  Don’t wait.

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